You know, for an industry that's as insular, self-serving, narcissistic and racially tone deaf as the mainstream gay porn industry is, they sure the fuck knows how to throw a party on a Monday night. In fact, about the only thing that prevented last night's 2011 Cybersocket Awards from being a complete smash - insofar as putting on one of these things goes - was that Gilbert Gottfried Jason Sechrest still hasn't figured at a way to remain relevant without caterwauling at the top of that insufferable voice: Notice Me!
The event, which was held at The Factory Nightclub in Los Angeles, wasn't necessarily an awards show in the traditional sense - their was no sample clips as the nominees were being announced or lengthy speeches by Jesus-thanking winners - as it was an opportunity for porn stars, their producers and their fans to mingle in a haze of 90-proof vodka, chaps and painfully well-defined abs, biceps and pecs.
The first half of the night was dominated by Sister Roma and a gum-chewing Tim Valenti who held court in the main lounge, interviewing a parade of stars under the glare of lights, cameras and cell phones acting as both. In the backroom, Rhea Litre of WeHo Knights Television - a skinnier, chattier but equally handsome (and equally made up) version of Adam Lambert - interviewed many of the same stars.
The second half of the night were the awards themselves. Chi Chi LaRue acted as MC from a sound booth about ten feet away from the main stage while the stars - including the very funny Chico's Angels, three buxom, Latina-appearing drag queens who charmed the raucous crowd with their intermittent blend of campy, racially-tinged humor - were whisked on and off the main stage in a timely fashion. And given both the amount of alcohol being poured both into the (mostly) free drinks and then the drinkers themselves, it really is quite remarkable that not a single person fell off the stage or said anything completely untoward. (Just my luck, too. I finally find a place that knows how to make a drink and give it away for free and I have to go and get sober. Damn you, sobriety!)
There were some, er, interesting moments...
When I caught Diesel Washington's eye (and smiled at him) he almost seemed a little sad. Like it was in that very moment that he realized he left his crossbow and arrow in his car, the one he was going to shoot me in the head with.
When I saw Brent Corrigan again (I spotted him at the Ralph's in downtown San Diego last Sunday), my first thought was: Great teeth. Well, okay, I'm lying. Actually, my very first thought was which Mystic Tan package did he buy at iTan? (Fair-skinned people unite!)
Steve Cruz positively radiates good energy. In fact, I'm convinced he may be the solution to our nation's energy crisis.
Peter Le is amazing in every way, shape and form (but especially form). And congrats for winning 'Best Asian-themed Site.'
If you don't come away liking Rob Romoni, you're an idiot. (How's that for diplomacy?)
(Note to self: Brent, Steve and Peter are all Scorpios. Examine Scorpio obsession.)
But what really struck me - really struck me - was how diverse the crowd was (there were a refreshingly high number of Asian guys). Which got me thinking...if the crowd was so diverse why was there so little diversity in the nominations? I mean aside from the ghettoization of the minority-themed categories - which ironically gives black, Asian and Latino performers and producers a better shot of being recognized - who is voting for these things? ItsGonnaHurt.com won 'Best Black-Themed Site," for Christ's sake! If ItsGonnaHurt.com is a black-themed site than I'm Malcolm X.
And Jason Sechrest for the 'Best Porn Blog?' WTF?? Seriously, I have absolutely zero issues with not being nominated. It's always nice to be recognized, for sure, but there were three or four people/peoples that were nominated in the 'Best Porn Blog' category - people that I don't even necessarily see eye to eye with - that write far funnier, far more insightful, far more timely and far, far more perspicacious posts - and with their eyes closed - than that attention whore.
There's just no accounting for taste.
But you know what? I had a hot date, I looked pretty good, I didn't have any drinks poured on my head and I got out of there without relapsing. So, all in all, I'd say it was a pretty fun night, even though I realized once and for all I'm not going to singelhandedly make the mainstream gay porn industry any less insular, less racially tone deaf yadda, yadda, yadda.
Whatever.
A complete list of winners appears after the jump.
(Photography by Donatel)
(Ed. note: A big thanks to Holly, Morgan, Tim and the rest of the crew at Cybersocket for the professional courtesies and the gift bag with the studded, leather jockstrap.)
MyGayCash.com
Industry Choice: Alternative Billing Company
Netbilling.com
Industry Choice: Billing Company
Epoch.com
Industry Choice: Business Person of the Year
Gary Jackson, CCBill.com
Industry Choice: Company of the Year
BuddyProfits.com
Industry Choice: Content Provider
SexEntertain.com
Industry Choice: Hosting Company
NationalNet.com
Industry Choice: Industry Magazine
FubarTimes.com
Industry Choice: Live Cam
GayIMLive.com
Industry Choice: White Label
Men4SexNow.com-Men4RentNow.com
Industry Choice: Video Company
Next Door Entertainment
Industry Choice: Webmaster Community
JustUsWebmasters.com
Cybersocket Wall of Fame/Award of Excellence
Michael Brandon
Surfer’s Choice: Best Amateur Video Site
TimTales.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Amateur Webcam
PierreFitch.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Asian Theme Site
PeterFever.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Black Theme Site
ItsGonnaHurt.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Escort Site
Rentboy.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best European Theme Site
MenAtPlay.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Fetish Site
ActiveDuty.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Free Site
Adam4Adam.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Hookup Site
Manhunt.net
Surfer’s Choice: Best Latin Theme Site
HugeBrazilianDicks.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Live Cam
Flirt4Free.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Massage Site
MassageM4M.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Mega Site
Badpuppy.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Mobile Site
Grindr.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best New Site
TheNewBrentCorrigan.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Novelties Site
Male.Stockroom.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Original Content
RandyBlue.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Original Theme Site
TIE: MenOver30.com
TIE: StraightBoysFucking.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Personality
Chi Chi LaRue
Surfer’s Choice: Best Porn Blog
JasonCurious.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Porn Star
Steve Cruz
Surfer’s Choice: Best Reality Site
BaitBus.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Video Company
Lucas Entertainment
Surfer’s Choice: Best VOD Company
NakedSword.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Voyeur Site
DickDorm.com
Surfer’s Choice: Movie of the Year
FUCK U (Rascal Video/Channel 1 Releasing)
Industry Choice: Affiliate Program
MyGayCash.com
Industry Choice: Alternative Billing Company
Netbilling.com
Industry Choice: Billing Company
Epoch.com
Industry Choice: Business Person of the Year
Gary Jackson, CCBill.com
Industry Choice: Company of the Year
BuddyProfits.com
Industry Choice: Content Provider
SexEntertain.com
Industry Choice: Hosting Company
NationalNet.com
Industry Choice: Industry Magazine
FubarTimes.com
Industry Choice: Live Cam
GayIMLive.com
Industry Choice: White Label
Men4SexNow.com-Men4RentNow.com
Industry Choice: Video Company
Next Door Entertainment
Industry Choice: Webmaster Community
JustUsWebmasters.com
Cybersocket Wall of Fame/Award of Excellence
Michael Brandon
Surfer’s Choice: Best Amateur Video Site
TimTales.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Amateur Webcam
PierreFitch.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Asian Theme Site
PeterFever.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Black Theme Site
ItsGonnaHurt.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Escort Site
Rentboy.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best European Theme Site
MenAtPlay.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Fetish Site
ActiveDuty.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Free Site
Adam4Adam.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Hookup Site
Manhunt.net
Surfer’s Choice: Best Latin Theme Site
HugeBrazilianDicks.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Live Cam
Flirt4Free.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Massage Site
MassageM4M.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Mega Site
Badpuppy.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Mobile Site
Grindr.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best New Site
TheNewBrentCorrigan.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Novelties Site
Male.Stockroom.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Original Content
RandyBlue.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Original Theme Site
TIE: MenOver30.com
TIE: StraightBoysFucking.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Personality
Chi Chi LaRue
Surfer’s Choice: Best Porn Blog
JasonCurious.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Porn Star
Steve Cruz
Surfer’s Choice: Best Reality Site
BaitBus.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Video Company
Lucas Entertainment
Surfer’s Choice: Best VOD Company
NakedSword.com
Surfer’s Choice: Best Voyeur Site
DickDorm.com
Surfer’s Choice: Movie of the Year
FUCK U (Rascal Video/Channel 1 Releasing)
You took the most amazing pics of the night. Really beautiful. Thanks so much for being there.
Posted by: Jason Sechrest | February 09, 2011 at 01:28 AM
Wow Donnatella (correct spelling) took some great pix, I had so much fun being your guest. Events like this are best enjoyed with some good people.
Great Post!
Posted by: DeWayne | February 09, 2011 at 02:57 PM
Thanks, Dewayne. And thanks for reminding me to put a link to his photography up!
Posted by: Victor | February 09, 2011 at 06:00 PM
Hey you,
Thanks so much for coming! You are quite handsome in person!:) I am sorry I did not get to hang with you more I was busy being Door NAZI lol.. But next year for sure!
Holly
Posted by: holly | February 10, 2011 at 01:08 PM